Scientists Prove That Gaslighting Is In Fact Not Real, You’ve Been Making It Up
By Parker “Park” Hawley
CLINTON, NY—A recent study conducted by Hamilton College in New York has found incredible news, gaslighting has never existed and you have just been making it up all along.
Dr. Patrick, the head of the study, stated that his team went through “extensive research” to disprove gaslighting’s existence. When asked what kind of research they conducted, he replied, “I already told you what kind of research.” When a reporter rebuffed this statement, Patrick simply said, “I just told you, are you feeling alright? I think you might be going crazy.”
Nonetheless, the news that gaslighting doesn’t exist has reached far and wide and has sparked conversations throughout the globe.
Numerous politicians, including President Trump, have stated that they have always known gaslighting didn’t exist and the public should have known as well. Trump went as far as to say, “We’ve known this, everyone’s known this, your mom has known this, your dog has known this, even your dog’s mom has known this. This report has been out for years, I don’t know why you’re saying it’s just come out. Anyone who is saying it’s just come out, I mean, what do you mean it’s just come out? Those people are just crazy and crooked and should probably check into a hospital.”
The generic ex-boyfriend of numerous women, Brad, has also come out in a text that he copied and pasted and texted to every one of his exes. The text, retrieved by The Settler, reads as follows: “I TOLD U I TOLD U U WERE WATCHING TOO MANY TIK TOKS AND TALKING ABOUT GASLIGHTING AND CALLING ME A GASLIGHTER BUT WHOS LAUGHING NOW U ALWAYS WERE CRAZY U CRAZY FEMALE” the message was followed up by a separate, also copied and pasted message, asking, “so you wanna get back together now that u know I was right ;)…”
Gaslighting being disproven has also led major dictionaries to remove the word from their books entirely. When speaking with the President of Merriam-Webster about the word’s removal, Gregory Barlow remarked that the word was never in the dictionary so they didn’t have to remove it. When shown a past edition of the dictionary with gaslighting in it, Barlow screamed “That’s photoshop, it never existed, you’re crazy” before falling to the fetal position as he whispered, “It never existed you’re just crazy” repeatedly.
The stir that the disproving of gaslighting has provoked is crazy, but what is known is that gaslighting never existed all along, you were just making it up. Gaslighting never existed all along, you were just making it up. Gaslighting never existed all along, you were just making it up. Gaslighting never existed all along, you were just making it up. Gaslighting never existed all along, you were just making it up. Gaslighting never existed all along, you were just making it up…
